Do you ever feel like a porcupine on a cold night? If you haven't watch the video below, allow me to explain what I mean with a personal example.

As a 29-year-old single guy, there are times when I feel lonely. Very lonely. The kind of crippling loneliness that makes you consider doing drastic things... like taking out a personal ad on Craigslist, or reaching out to an ex from a very unhealthy relationship. At times like this, there's nothing I want more than to be close to someone.

And yet, when I've found myself in healthy relationships, I've often pulled away in fear as I allow myself to get attached and feel vulnerable. It's as if the thing I want most in the world is also the thing I'm most scared of. It has the most power to hurt me, and therefore leaves me wondering whether the loneliness wasn't so bad after all.

Have you ever retreated from a relationship out of fear?

Do you find yourself enduring the pain of cuddling with a "porcupine" out of fear of the cold of lonliness?

Why do you think we do this, and how do you generate your own warmth?