The Art Of Loving
A while ago, I came across this Youtube video of a drummer in a wedding band. The band - like most wedding bands - was good, not great. The vocals were relatively tight. The lead guitar was hitting all his hammers and runs. But they weren't anything incredibly special or unique... and then I saw the drummer.
Seriously guys. The drummer!
This dude (Steve "The Mad Drummer" Moore) was playing the drums as if it were his last performance in front of a sold out crowd at Madison Square Garden. It was as if his drum sticks were determining the very beat of the earth's heart, and if he were to stop, the humanity as we know it would cease to exist. Steve wasn't playing the drums. He was the drums.
I couldn't stop smiling.
Seriously. Watch:
We all have a friend like Steve "The Mad Drummer" Moore. They are always the first person on the dance floor. They could turn a funeral into a party. They can talk to anyone. They will try anything. They dive in head first, and live life turned up to 11, and they do it all with a smile.
Ty and Terri love this way.
Listening to them talk about their relationship is like watching a professional mime play Charades, or Josh Groban sing Karaoke. They have mastered the art of love by falling in love with practicing.
Fall In Love With The Practice
There's something to be said about loving to practice.
When I was a kid I played the piano for over a decade. I got pretty good... but I hated to practice. My parents forced me for years to sit down at that piano for 30-60 minutes a day and pound on those keys. I got good enough to accompany choirs, and impress a few girls...
Then there was this girl who lived up the street. She LOVED the piano. She played for hours on end. She was in love with practicing. She could sit down and look at any sheet of music and make the melodies flow from that black box like some sort of musical sorcerer. When she played ragtime, you could see smoke rise from the keyboard. When she played the classics, you couldn't help but close your eyes and sway to the music. She didn't just hit the keys. She pulled emotions, and life out of them.
She was amazing... because she LOVED to practice.
When we asked Terri about loving Ty, she said this:
At the end of Ty’s life, I want him to be able to say, "Terri was the greatest earthly blessing in my life - the best thing that ever happened to me - and that I’m a better man because of how she loved me." And that’s the goal that I live with every day. That’s how I want to love this man.
It's already obvious that Terri loves Ty, but what makes their relationship so incredible isn't that they love each other. Millions of couples love each other. The secret is that they love loving each other. They love practicing love on each other.
They love serving each other.
They love complimenting each other.
They love surprising each other, comforting each other, encouraging each other, touching each other, and bragging about each other.
Love is an art, and they are master artists because they've fallen in love with the practice. They refuse to settle for less than their best every day.
Are you in love with loving? What can you do to enjoy the practice of loving more fully? What did you think about Ty and Terri's interview? Please leave your thoughts, tips, and ideas in the comments!
If you want more from Ty and Terri, you can check out Ty's book "A Thousand Screaming Mules - The Story of Stubbon Hope and One Dad's Dream to Transform Kids' Lives"
Also check out Ty's podcast, Wordz from the Hood, where he and former Hope Center for Kids youth Frank Lucas, provide a window into the heart of life in the inner city for young people.