I met one of my soulmates once. I say "one of" because I'm pretty sure we have more than one. I engaged knowing we'd have limited time... One month to be exact. For the first time I understood "when you know you know". My brain said no, yet my heart said “you have to.”
Thinking I'd been in love before, this man shook me to my core, made me explore things inside myself I hadn’t discovered, brought me somewhere I felt liberated to go do more and be better.
He moved to another country, which truthfully took me many months to get over. We tried and failed, and the universe stopped rooting for us.
I could hate him for raising my bar on who my partner in life should be. I could lament the pain of losing him. I could weep at the fact he's getting married now. I could cut his memory entirely and just move on.
But everyone we encounter has something they give us... An indelible mark that stamps us. His impact has lasted far beyond our physical proximity. I needed that type of love experience to stretch me, to show me what was possible. I lived a fairytale I didn't know was out there; and now I can believe there's something even more extraordinary for me to discover. I also believe that I am worthy of it.
We are a collection of experiences, places, people. This love is a bronzed plaque in my collection, part of what makes me who I am today. So, instead of pain, I feel gratitude. I'm thankful for the lesson in utter selflessness, profound connection and the unnecessary walls that were torn down.
My memory chooses the rose-colored glasses because what I gained far exceeded the eventual loss. Time and healing taught me that.
My Knight may or may not be around the corner, but I am open to what's next. Magical love is possible, so instead of fearing heart-break, I trust. Our scars can be a loving reminder of where we've come from and that no matter how devastated we feel, we do make it back. In fact, we make it better.
You see, we get to take a little of everyone with us. I believe he crossed my path to teach me something about myself. He'll probably never know... And that's ok. This one is for me.
I hope you turn your heart-break into hope.
Jean is the Director of Sales for a international beer marketing/branding company. She is on a daily journey to become a better version of herself and develop and inspire those around her. As an entrepreneurial-minded writer, mentor and speaker, she writes about sales, life and beer on her blog. Follow her at @JeanOnTap.
[Header photo credit: Mio_Pls]